Cheatin' and beatin'

EDITOR'S NOTE: David Green is moving, joining Lee Montgomery and Krista Voda in the new Turn 3 blog. The Infield will still be inhabited by most of the usual suspects you're used to seeing there.

By David Green

Ah, the things those crew members to do those racecars and the things those drivers do with those racecars!

Cheatin' and beatin', techin' and wreckin' -- they keep the blood-pressure numbers up, don't they?

Not only have those topics garnered more than their share of headlines lately, but they are among the primary ingredients that make up the sport of auto racing.

I'm the guy who has written more than once that racing is about fans watching drivers drive cars, and I stand by that fundamental assessment. But when the competition gets a little spirited, with regard to the fellows who prepare the equipment and the ones with the steering wheels in their hands, it sure makes for a more interesting show.

Certainly, the last couple of weeks on the NASCAR circuit have given us plenty to debate. The reaction up and down pit road is interesting enough, and then when you throw in the fans' perceptions of things, it really gets heated.

Personally, I'd like to see a simplified rulebook, with some guidelines that both clearly establish what you can and cannot do and also effectively negate the advantages of things you might do that are either unregulated or hard to detect. "Not so easy to do," you say, and I reply, "What -- you mean, more difficult and controversial than the ongoing attempt to maintain a level playing field by micromanagement?"

I believe things that are blatant, outright cheating -- concealed nitrous oxide, oversized engines, soaked tires -- ought to be severely punished. Post-race inspections ought to be limited to checking things that require a teardown or disassembly of components that cannot feasibly be done in pre-race inspection. Other things, such as body shapes and ride height and even weight, ought to be checked before the race and that should be the end of it.

Other than that, let's let the crew members be creative and let the drivers see what they can do with the machines they are given.

I don't believe the sport is well-served when there's a laundry list of nit-picky "violations" released every Tuesday, especially when the press release never provides any context. From a rocket engine to a seat belt with the wrong "born on" date, it's all lumped under the "actions detrimental to the sport" heading. That is, in itself, detrimental; all it does is contribute to the image of racing as a sport of "cheaters."

Then, there's the matter of races devolving into demolition derbies, as was the case in two of three Chase races so far.

Somewhere between a civilized, follow-the-leader parade and outright carnage, there is spirited, exciting racing. Just where that sweet spot is found depends upon the individual competitor or observer.

Likely, you could never assemble anything resembling a consensus among drivers about what is acceptable racing etiquette. (The one universal rule: "No one should ever, ever wreck me.") But there is one sure-fire way to stop a lot of the dirty/reckless/overly aggressive (pick your adjective) driving that goes on these days: Take the cowcatchers off the cars.

Fix things so that if you hit something with the front end of your car, the nose of your car is going to be deformed. If it's deformed, it will cease to function the way you need it to. It won't take long for you to learn not to hit things on purpose. Magically, you will learn to avoid most if not all of those "unavoidable" rear-end impacts other drivers have been feeling when you're behind them.

And if you do make a mistake and hit somebody, we'll know for sure your apology is sincere.