The Hate-tona 500

By DAVID GREEN

Today's Daytona 500 was many things, none of them "kinder" or "gentler." "Contentious" was more like it.

There was something for everybody who hates anything or anybody in NASCAR racing. Kyle Busch, before and after he became the subject of much debate during Speedweeks, didn't mince words. He hates Daytona, maybe more than Kyle Petty hates Darlington.

Winner Jimmie Johnson put the crowning touch on things when he sarcastically "dedicated" his Daytona 500 victory "to all the haters of the 48 team."

Wow. What a gracious comment, especially from somebody whose outfit had its leader sent home from this event because of a rules infraction.

Hearing that remark, one would think there's more enmity between the Lowe's team and its detractors than there is between -- oh, Tony Stewart and Matt Kenseth, or Ryan Newman and Casey Mears (or, perhaps, Dodge and Casey Mears).

Maybe it's just me and my weird way of looking at things, but somehow I don't think sticking out your tongue and chanting "na-na-na-naaaa-na!" from victory lane is going to make those "haters of the 48 team" rush out and buy your souvenirs or pass Home Depot stores on their way to Lowe's.

So, how might Jimmie alter things and become a beloved Daytona 500 winner instead of a reviled one?

1. Stop cheating, or get better at doing it and not getting caught.

2. Stop being disingenuous about infractions when you do get busted. Just 'fess up that you tried to get away with something and didn't get away with it. (After this many times with your hand in the cookie jar, I mean, come on.)

3. Bad-mouth Jeff Gordon once in awhile. Lots of NASCAR fans who boo you boo Gordon, too.

Just kidding. It's like Abraham Lincoln said about fooling people -- you're not going to get all of them to like you all of the time.

It's just not going to happen. Relax and forget about it. Some people are going to like you, and some are not. Enjoy the fans you have and tolerate the ones who don't like you -- or cultivate a perverse enjoyment of tormenting them.

No one did that better than the late Dale Earnhardt.

If you're going to make snide remarks like you did tonight in victory lane, learn to do it with a grin and a twinkle in your eye, the way Earnhardt did that night at Bristol when he said, after spinning out Terry Labonte, "I didn't mean to wreck him. I only meant to rattle his cage a little."

I guess the only things Earnhardt hated were restrictor plates and those poachers he caught deer hunting on his property that time in 1993 or '94, just days before the Winston Cup awards banquet.

He never sarcastically dedicated anything to them.