Turn 3

Trick Or Treatin' NASCAR Style

By Mark Young

On the eve of what is quite possibly the Dentist's Union's favorite holiday I was thinking a little bit about what it would be like to go trick or treating in the garage area this coming weekend in Texas.  What teams would be handing out the good stuff, and what would some of the drivers wear?  I figure we should have some fun with the sport as lately all we have done is criticize our favorite past time.

From a family-friendly perspective David Gilliland and the #38 team will be the busiest place in the garage as they hand out all of those M&M's.   On a more adult level clearly the #2, #8, #40 will have long lines of beer guzzling guys dressed as cross-dressing pregnant women looking for free samples while the hardcore fans will be at the #07 and #7 haulers looking for something to put in their half-empty cans of Jeff Gordon's energy drink.  Of course after we are done and have visited the alcohol teams a dozen times or so a person will need a boost to get them through the rest of the day.  Red Bull would be perfect but after three laps around the garage it is determined that Red Bull didn't qualify for the race........

So now that our thirsts are quenched it is time to find something to eat.  Smoke is sitting out front of his hauler with his skinnier twin brother Jared handing out subs while right next door Matt Kenseth offers curly fries from Arby's.  David Reutimann is riding around the garage area tossing Domino's pizza like Frisbees, someday that Oreo desert pizza mustache will fill in.  A little further down the road we find Bill Elliott dressed up to look like Little Debbie handing out cupcakes.  Bill doesn't look too happy but Ken Schrader is walking around with a neat little grin on his face......."provisional that" he says to Bill.

Awesome Bill isn't the only one walking around in a costume either.  Michael Waltrip is walking around in a NAPA driver's suit trying to look like a driver.  Ned Jarrett is walking around in a Dale Jarrett costume while Dale is dressed like Ned.......Nah, I can't imagine either of them dressing up.  HEY LOOK!!!  There's Jimmy Spencer walking around with Todd Bodine's glasses, uh nope, it's Todd Bodine walking around with Jimmy Spencer's wig.  Someone is either playing a joke on Kyle Bush or they got the Holiday mixed up.  Kyle and Tony the Tiger are handing out Corn Flakes while wearing Santa hats.  Makes me want to ask Tony to play Santa and send his elf down to get some cupcakes from Bill Elliott.

I could go on and on but I am more interested in what my fellow blog-heads can come up with!!

Anyone for Some Eliminations?

By Keith Ott

  Are you beginning to see why some of these drivers had no business being in the Chase?  Well, in “My Chase,” they don’t get to stay.  It’s race number 7, of the Chase, now, and it’s time for our first 3 eliminations.  Misters Truex, Kenseth and Hamlin, You Are the Weakest Links.  It’s back into the fold for you.  I almost feel like I’m doing you a favor.  No more lame excuses to make, no more Chase questions.  You can thank me later.

  You have to admit that Jr. and DEI have picked up the entertainment value of having a DNF.  The blown engines were always spectacular with billowing clouds and sparks, and, just when the engines were starting to get old, they pulled the ol’ 180mph flying wheel trick.  Brilliant!!!   Some might say it’s a DEI revenge/conspiracy, but I don’t see it.  No family feud or infighting would cause them to put a drivers life at risk.  As for the engines, it’s a new power plant and I think that since they are out of the Chase, that they are testing and pushing the envelope.

  Edwards and Kenseth, no blood, no foul.  On every team, in every racing venue, where you have more than one star, you have to do an ego balancing act.  Alonso/Hamilton; the Roush stable; the Hendrick stable, they’re all the same.  Actually, I’m surprised there aren’t more, “Mom likes you best,” issues.

  How do you not sell out Atlanta?  I don’t know what the attendance actually was, but I’m pretty sure it could have been about 20K higher.  I’m not sure I’d invite the blimp back.The overhead shots of the crowd, and the acres of empty parking, were sad.  Certainly, the first 7 races, of the Chase, have done nothing to fill those empty seats.  Maybe, even 5 races/weeks is too long for a playoff.  There’s no urgency in 10 weeks.  Pick your 10 Chasers after Atlanta.  They race on their own points system.  Eliminate 2 in week 8, 3 in week 9, and 5 have a Super Bowl in week 10.  Just a thought.

  How about them Bill’s?  60 minutes of the dullest football in history, but they won.

  Petty would have red flagged the event for his cowboy hat.

  And, that’s it.  How did you see Atlanta?

Stay tuned to learn who will be champ

By DAVID GREEN

To all those Chase bashers out there, those of you who are disgruntled with NASCAR's method of selecting a champion, I say to you: It could be worse.

That's damning with faint praise, I know, but it's true. What if we had to wait until almost a month after the final race of the season to find out the name of our new champion?

That's the situation for Formula One fans -- and, more pertinently, for drivers Kimi Raikkonen and Lewis Hamilton, who had one of the greatest championship battles in auto racing history this year but now have to wait until Nov. 15 to find out which one is the champion.

For the record, for those of you who don't follow F1 and may not be aware of the facts, Raikkonen completed a remarkable come-from-behind charge last weekend to win the Brazilian Grand Prix and, apparently, take his first world driving championship by the slimmest of margins -- 110 points to 109 -- over Hamilton, who finished seventh.

But three of the cars that finished between Raikkonen and Hamilton were reported to have had some issues with the rules -- specifically, with the temperature of the fuel. Stewards noted the problems, but opted not to penalize the three drivers.

After the race, Hamilton's team -- McLaren Mercedes -- protested the result. Obviously, it is their hope that the three cars will be disqualified and that Hamilton will move up from seventh to fourth place, leapfrogging past Raikkonen to become F1's first-ever rookie champion. F1's World Motorsport Council will rule on the appeal in Paris Nov. 15.

In its early history, NASCAR was pretty quick to revise results. Many times, fans watched one driver take the checkered flag and celebrate the victory, only to find out later that a different winner had been declared. More famous incidents include the very first race in what is now the Nextel Cup Series, when Glenn Dunaway was disqualified because of suspension modifications. Jim Roper was named the winner.

A driver named Larry Frank won what was NASCAR's biggest race, the Southern 500, in 1962, but only after a scoring recheck confirmed that Junior Johnson, who had enjoyed the victory celebration, was not in fact the winner.

Then, there was black driver Wendell Scott's only victory, in December 1963 (a race that was part of the 1964 schedule) at Jacksonville, Fla. Buck Baker was flagged the winner, but hours later, the scoring was changed and Scott was named the winner.

In recent decades, NASCAR has opted to try to fix things while the race is in progress -- such as in 1990 at North Wilkesboro, N.C., when a lengthy yellow-flag period was held while Morris Metcalfe and his team of scorers tried to sort out the running order. Brett Bodine was determined to be the rightful leader, and he went on to win his only Cup Series victory that day.

When the problem cannot be remedied at the time, NASCAR's policy has been not to change the result that fans watched.

The subject is open to debate, but I think that's the right thing to do.

Mistakes happen. Usually competent people screw up royally sometimes. If you can amend something before much time has passed, fine. Past a certain point, though, an error is uncorrectable. Someone may have "won" something they didn't deserve, and someone else may have been "robbed."

But that's the way it goes.

Most major sports nowadays make extensive use of instant replay to ensure that a questionable decision by referees was correct. That's fine, even though -- as in the Brett Bodine scoring incident -- it often causes interruptions in the flow of the game that may or may not have an impact on what happens later.

For a dispute to drag on interminably before a decision is made is ridiculous. The worst example in auto racing was the 1981 Indianapolis 500, when Bobby Unser was flagged the winner, drank the milk, et cetera, et cetera -- only to learn the result had been protested. Mario Andretti was declared the winner the next day. Unser appealed the decision, and in October -- five months later -- his appeal was upheld and Unser's victory was restored.

The only thing missing from the F1 fiasco is the intervention of the Reverends Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton. Frankly, I expect Jesse and Al to join in that brouhaha any time, considering that Hamilton is F1's first black driver and surely there's a racism issue to exploit here.

Thankfully, we don't have such to worry about in NASCAR. Not yet, anyway. Let's enjoy that while we can.

If I Was Chairman Of NASCAR....No Free Rides!!

By Mark Young

During my first full week as Chairman of NASCAR I have had so much fun that I have decided to announce another rule change for next year.  I never realized how fun it could be to control such an entity as big as NASCAR.  I was surprised to see that so many people out there even paid attention to where NASCAR races were held or what time of year it took place.  I am sorry you didn't 100% like my new schedule, hang in there, we will keep working on it.  Now on with some more changes.

U WANT SOME?

First off let me state that I absolutely despise the fact that the top 35 in points are guaranteed to race the following week.  ARE YOU KIDDING ME?  Well let me tell you something gang, that crap is over with.  How can we expect the smaller teams to get into the field?  Well here is what we are going to do to alleviate the situation.

THE TOP 35 GUARANTEE IS ABOLISHED.  With 50+ cars showing up for the race each weekend we don't need to worry about field-fillers taking spots away from full-time race teams.  There will be two days of qualifying, just there used to be.  On Friday everyone will attempt to qualify but only the 25 fastest are in the race.  Round two of qualifying will be on Saturday morning and the fastest 18 of the remaining cars make the field.  It doesn't matter if the fastest on Saturday beats the pole position, they will still start 26th.

THERE WILL BE NO PROVISIONALS.  I repeat, NO PROVISIONALS.  I don't care if your name is Gordon, Johnson, Stewart, or Jesus.  If you aren't at least 43rd fastest on the charts you go home.  If you go slow or crash on Friday you can try again on Saturday.  The NHRA has a similar rule and they still seem to fill the seats on Sunday, even when John Force missed the show.  What this does is create more of an emphasis on winning and not just sitting back cruising along because a team is in the Chase, or comfortably in the top 35.  Go fast or go home.

So let's just say Dale Jr. misses the race in California next February.  Do you think that every Dale Jr. fan in California is not going to show up because of it?  I highly doubt it.  Maybe California isn't the right race to make a comparison but a lot of people out there take vacation to go to the race.  They have already purchased their ticket, hotel room, campsite, etc.  To go home without seeing the race because their favorite driver didn't qualify is crazy.  I tell you what, send me your money I have to buy beer for Keith.

That's what I think, what say you?

If I Was Chairman Of NASCAR...Schedule Changes...Lots Of Them

By Mark Young

Well after that gooey little rumor Robin Miller from SpeedTv wrote this weekend about Brian France stepping down as Chairman of NASCAR I got to thinking.  Now I know that thinking is usually something that is followed closely behind by pain or embarrassment for me but this time it was fun.  So fun in fact that I had to write it down.  I figure heck if Brian France can be named Chairman and nearly ruin the second largest spectator sport in the United States anyone can.....why not me?

So here we go my fellow blog-heads, this is the first of a couple posts dedicated to some things that Brian France just can't figure out and what I would do to change it.

U WANT SOME?

As Chairman of NASCAR I would actually attend the races.  I would walk around and take things in, talk to the fans, the sponsors, the teams, and listen to what they have to say.  Heck, if it wasn't for them I wouldn't be getting a paycheck.  The next thing I would do is, rather than trying to build new tracks in big city markets, take a close look at the schedule and see where else in the country I could take the sport where quality tracks already exist. 

You got it, I would rewrite the entire schedule.  Gone are the years of going to so many tracks twice a year when some of them can't sell out one race.  Also it is about time certain races got special treatment (cough, Darlington, cough, Southern 500, cough).  If the Chase is supposed to separate the men from the boys then there should be one race for each type of track the Series races on.  Oh, and by the way, since I am sick and tired of the Series's trophy changing names every three years I am renaming it too.  From now on it is the Bill France Cup, sponsored by (name the company here).

I have denoted the races I have added or rescheduled in RED, what the venue is scheduled in 2008 for in BLUE.  Also, night races are in GREEN

2008 NASCAR FRANCE CUP presented by Sprint SERIES SCHEDULE
Date Site Feb 9 Budweiser Shootout at Daytona – Daytona International Speedway*
Feb 17 Daytona International Speedway
Feb 24 Rockingham, NC – (California)
Mar 2 Las Vegas Motor Speedway
Mar 9 Atlanta Motor Speedway
Mar 15 Gateway International Speedway – (Bristol)
Mar 30 California Speedway – (Martinsville)
Apr 5 Texas Motor Speedway
Apr 12 O’Rielly Raceway Park (Indianapolis) – (Phoenix)
Apr 27 Talladega Superspeedway
May 3 Richmond International Raceway
May 10 Kentucky Speedway-(Darlington)

May 17 NASCAR Sprint All-Star Challenge – Lowe’s Motor Speedway*
May 25 Lowe’s Motor Speedway
Jun 1 Dover International Speedway
Jun 8 Pocono Raceway
Jun 15 Michigan International Speedway
Jun 22 Infineon Raceway
Jun 29 New Hampshire International Speedway
Jul 5 Bristol Motor Speedway - (Daytona)
Jul 12 Chicagoland Speedway
Jul 27 Indianapolis Motor Speedway
Aug 3 Nashville Super Speedway (Pocono Raceway)
Aug 10 Watkins Glen International
Aug 17 Iowa Speedway (Michigan International Speedway)
Aug 23 The Milwaukee Mile (Bristol Motor Speedway)
Aug 31 Darlington Southern 500 (Day Race) (California Speedway)
Sep 6 Richmond International Raceway
*Sep 14 Homestead-Miami Speedway (New Hampshire International Speedway)
*Sep 21 Road Atlanta (Dover International Speedway)
*Sep 28 Kansas Speedway
*Oct 5 Talladega Superspeedway
*Oct 11 Bristol Motor Speedway (Lowe’s Motor Speedway)
*Oct 19 Martinsville Speedway
*Oct 25 Texas Motor Speedway (Atlanta Motor Speedway)
*Nov 2 North Wilkesboro (Texas Motor Speedway)
*Nov 8 Phoenix International Raceway
*Nov 15 Daytona International Speedway (Homestead-Miami Speedway)

Yup, the season will begin and end in Daytona.  Darlington gets the Southern 500 back and it will be held in the daytime so the lady in black can change with the weather.  Take note that I added a road course to the Chase as well.  Daytona in July was replaced by Bristol on Saturday night.  In fact, nearly half of the races will be run at night.  Also, I would tell the TV networks that start times for all daytime races, without lights, will start at 1:00 P.M. local time.  that way if there is bad weather we will have every chance possible to get the race in on the scheduled day.  You noticed that Texas and Atlanta are visited twice.  Well that is only because the following year Michigan, Dover, Pocono, a combination of two per year will get a second date.  This will rotate and create more anticipation and demand for tickets.

Well, I am curious to see what you guys think about this.

Could Christmas Come Early?

By Mark Young

While doing some reading this morning I stumbled across a little blurb from SpeedTV.com's Robin Miller that caught my attention.  Now if you don't know Robin, he is a frequent visitor on Wind Tunnel, and is known for stirring up the stink pot if you know what I mean.  His on-air attitude makes me question his credibility but what he wrote in his blog REALLY caught my attention.

He mentioned in his rumor segment that Brian France could be stepping down as chairman of NASCAR and headed to Grand Am and will be replaced by his uncle Jim France.  Reading this reminded me of getting the L.C. Penny Christmas catalog in the fall.  I would read through every page in the toy section wishing to get all of the things I circled.

Even if this is merely a rumor the thought of Pope Brian stepping down has got me a little excited.

Trim the Fat

By Keith Ott

Not that I want to see the Chase survive, but if it wants to be treated like a playoff and generate at least a bit of excitement it has to trim the fat.

Trim #1:  The Chase is too long.  Ten races, 27% of the season, is too long.  That’s way too long for our American playoff attention span.  A playoff needs a sense of urgency.  Cut it to five races.  If you want more attention, you have to make it short enough that the fans feel they’ll miss something if they don’t watch.

Trim #2:  Ten was a perfect number of Chase-ee’s.  Going to twelve just made it seem like you were pandering to the big name teams to get more of their guys in.  You weren’t, were you?

Trim #3:  Eliminations.  Playoffs need consequences.  Trim those ten down to five for the last race.  Eliminate 0-2-2-1, so five are in the last event.  Then, if you want playoff excitement, readjust the points.  This is your Super Bowl.  Set them equal, above the rest and add, +10 for every win in those first 4 races.  That’s a playoff!  The best team might get eliminated.  I don’t care.  NASCAR wanted a playoff and sometimes “shit happens,” in a playoff.  Join the rest, of the “playoff world,” and feel free to whine how your team had a great season and were most deserving, but, didn’t get a fair shake, had an off day, injuries, etc.  That’s a playoff, baby.

Other Fat:

Trim #4:  The Top 35.  Thirty-five cars do not deserve a free ride into the show.  Now, maybe, 35 qualify and the rest of the spots are based on the point standings.  But, if a top team can’t get in based on points, then maybe they ought to try harder.

Trim #5:  The “Lucky Dog.”  No more than two per event.  If you used that many, you’re not very lucky to begin with.

Trim #6:  The Champions Provisional.  Limit it to 2 per season.  It’s one thing to see a past master on a track he loved to race on.  It’s a whole different thing to see him being used for the “Top 35.” 

My Perfect Chase:

Forty-three cars race thirty-six races for the title.

Get Ready For The Jeff And Jimmie Show

By Mark Young

Well gang, no KOFM this week as it is pretty obvious Jeff Gordon is on a roll and is sitting comfortably in the thrown.  What I am concerned with is that for likely the rest of the season, as long as Jimmie stays close, we are going to get an overdose of J&J wherever we turn on the TV.  With the exception of Clint Bowyer, who for some reason doesn't seem to get enough attention, most of the other big names are nearly out of the running for the Chase.  Don't get me wrong, those two cars are on top of their game and deserve attention, but darn it there is going to 41 other cars on the track this weekend.

I wouldn't be surprised if the TV gurus get together with Pope Brian this week and institute a new rule.  Concrete barriers will be placed right down the center of the track creating two separate lanes reminiscent of a construction zone on the freeway.  The inside lane for Chase drivers, the other for everyone else in an effort to tighten the Chase so TV ratings will go up.

Jeff Gordon is showing why he was on top of the standings before the Chase jumbled up the points, and Jimmie is doing everything he can to show that he has what it takes to win as well.  What I hope the guys in the TV truck realize is that there are a lot of other story lines out there that need to be covered as well.

That's what I think, what say you?

Thoughts on Charlotte

By Keith Ott

Note intercepted from Brian France to Mike Helton:  Resend the Chase memo.  We supposedly started weeks ago, but some of the teams haven’t figured out that they’re in the Chase.  And, I want more/some action in this thing! 

How incredibly ironic was it that Tony Stewart gets the “Allstate, Move of the Race,” then hits 2 cars on pit road.  Talk about accident forgiveness.

I can’t even put a name to this line, because I spit beer out my nose when I heard it, but, whoever said, “Coliseum for the Courageous,” should be sent back to broadcasting school.  The rest of the broadcast was a great mediocre effort.  They were late on one restart that I saw, but, other than Rusty’s grating voice, there was nothing particularly great or damning about it.  I think that’s a good thing.  They’re there to report the event, not to become or compete with it.

Bowyer.  I really have no need to type anything else.  Look at your Chase predictions and see where you put him.  He got the Chase memo and came to play some ball.  He might also want to invest in a bigger souvenir trailer because no-one’s ignoring him now and he’s making fans. One more lap, in two races, and he’d have three wins in the Chase. 

The guys at the local Sherwin Williams store are going gonzo.  They thought they’d never sell that pink paint.

I have no idea what Gordon was thinking when he hit Junior.  Luckily, Jr. calmed before the storm.  Still that’s no way to treat a future teammate.

Empty seats, Nuff said.

I don’t want them to become F1-technomobiles, but I think Harvick, for one, might argue for tire pressure sensors.  Should he get them?  Nah, it’s those horrible/great calls from the driver and the crew that makes for drama.  “I gotta come back in.  We missed it,” is a lot more dramatic than, “Hey the thingy on the dash says the left front is down.”  Being a Harvick fan, I would rather they had just done 4 tires the first time.  Such is life.

Oh, the racing.  I thought it was decent.  It got routine at times, but that’s racing.  Unlike some, I like the night events.  I’m also sure NASCAR is happy for the Saturday date.  They aren’t going to beat the NFL in a ratings war.

Your thoughts?

Turn out the lights; the party's over

By DAVID GREEN

Sorry to let the air out of a NASCAR television promo, but every lap doesn't count any more. The Chase for the Cup, 2007, is over.

If Saturday night's final laps at Charlotte didn't convince you, fine. Keep watching, and keep hoping for the driver that you root for. But unless that driver is Jeff Gordon, you're going to be disappointed. Gordo is going to win the Nextel Cup championship.

It may have taken six years, but the Drive for Five is a done deal now.

OK, mathematically, it is not a done deal. I'm no math major, and the world-class screwup I made in my checking account last week proves it. (Has anyone else out there ever been overdrawn to the level of four figures?) But I realize Gordon has not officially clinched the title.

It's the unofficial clinching I'm talking about.

It's out of character that Gordon has gone five years without claiming a Cup. He is overdue to win it. He's certainly good enough. And when luck is on his side -- how else do you explain that it was Gordon who benefited from Ryan Newman's spin? -- he is virtually unbeatable.

Gordon fans may bristle at the suggestion that he needs to be lucky. But he does. Everybody does. Richard Petty put it best: "I'd druther be lucky than good, any day -- knowhutahmean?"

Petty, like Gordon, was lucky. Gordon, like Petty, is very, very good.

Tough combination to beat.

Turn out the lights; the party's over.